screenplay THE WAY WE WAR by Robert Patrick Part 2 of 3

EXT. STREET – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

 

Pitch-blackness. Tony’s jeep lights flare on. A car passes, lights off. Its DRIVER yells:

DRIVER

Turn off those lights, ass-hole!

IN THE JEEP

 

MELANIE

What did he say?

TONY

No lights after dark.

MELANIE

But why?

Suddenly GUNFIRE sounds around them. Melanie SCREAMS.

TONY

That’s why.

THE STREET

 

Tony veers expertly. GUNS fire. Bullets hit street near jeep.

IN THE JEEP

 

MELANIE

What’s happening?

TONY

What’s the matter? Think of the

headlines!

More GUNFIRE.

THE STREET

 

Tony veers through rubble, swerves to avoid other vehicles. GUNFIRE continues. Sparks fly everywhere.

IN THE JEEP

 

MELANIE

Stop it! Stop it!

Melanie fumbles for light-switch, car-keys, wheel, anything.

THE STREET

 

The jeep zigzags crazily. GUNFIRE sounds. Bullets strike sparks. Passing vehicles BLOW HORNS. Melanie SCREAMS. Tony YELLS.

MELANIE(Cont’d VO)

Stop it! Stop it!

TONY

Cut that out! Cut it out!

IN THE JEEP

INSERT

 

Melanie’s clawing hands hit and clutch Tony’s crotch.

TONY

 

lets out a profound CRY.

THE STREET

 

The jeep runs off the road into a cushioning hedge, stops.

IN THE JEEP

 

Tony MOANS as Melanie switches off motor and lights.

MELANIE

How could you do that to me?

TONY

With relish.

MELANIE

How could you know we’d be safe?

Tony turns to face her. He’s never been this scary before.

Melanie cringes.

TONY

(with both barrels)

Because I was raised in this rubble, honey. l know where the guns are and I know where

the girls are. That’s how I survived so far, and I’ll survive you. So you pull just one more Beverly Hills debutante party-prank on me, Miss Tits, and I’ll throw you to the wolves with your pants down. And I know where the wolves are in the mysterious Asian night. I was raised by them!

Melanie’s beautiful face is wet with sudden tears.

MELANIE

Oh, God, Tony, I don’t want to make

trouble for you! Less than anybody

in the world, trouble for anyone

like you! I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

Melanie reaches out, takes Tony’s angry face in her hands. He could almost collapse into that famous bosom, but he recoils.

TONY

How could even you be stupid enough

to think I’d soften for a woman’s tears?

Melanie stares at Tony, turns away.

MELANIE’S FACE

 

Tears and incredible weariness distort Melanie’s beautiful features. She looks out jeep window at —

MELANIE’S POV/ROADISE RUBBLE

 

— the hideous rubble of Thainia. Just enough light to see TWO ORPHAN CHILDREN scrabbling in the ruins beside barbed wire where an indifferent GUARD ignores them.

CHILDREN

You got gum, solider? You got

something to eat?

MELANIE’S FACE

 

She composes it and turns.

TONY’S POV/MELANIE’S FACE

 

It’s composed.

MELANIE

No, no, of course you wouldn’t.

Time to take me home, I think —

wherever that may be.

TONY

 

Tony is more moved than he’d admit. But he mockingly says —

TONY

Gee, Melanie, baby. I should have

known you’re not the kind of a girl

that parks on the first date.

Tony starts the jeep and backs out.

THE STREET

 

The jeep backs out and heads away down the dark street.

CUT TO:

EXT. A RESIDENCE — NIGHT — SHORTLY LATER

The most distinguished building left standing in Thainia. Its Colonial dignity contrasts with its barbed-wire fencing and gate-guards. A CAR ENGINE approaches. GUARDS brace, guns at ready.

GUARDS’ POV/THE STREET

 

Out of the darkness, Tony’s jeep appears.

THE GUARDS

 

laugh and relax. The jeep pulls into frame with Guards.

A GUARD

Hey, Tony.

ANGLE ON JEEP

 

The passenger door swings open. WE SEE of Tony only his hand. Melanie gets out of jeep. Guards go to attention.

A GUARD

Good evening, Ms. Marlowe. Right

this way, if you please.

Guards stand ready by Melanie while ANOTHER GUARD opens gate. MORE GUARDS appear, surround Melanie, and walk her through the gate.

ANGLE INSIDE GATE

 

Melanie and Guards go up walk to door. Melanie is composed. The jeep is visible over her shoulder. Tony’s hand appears and SLAMS the passenger door. Melanie reacts but slightly. Gate closes.

REVERSE ANGLE

 

Door of residence swings open and a motherly MATRON appears.

MATRON

Welcome, Ms. Marlowe. Your

accommodations are prepared.

ANOTHER ANGLE

 

on porch of residence as Matron stands aside to let Melanie enter. Guards remain on porch.

ANGLE ON MELANIE

 

as WE HEAR jeep PULLING AWAY. Melanie’s emotions fight on her face. Then, suitably “tweety,” Melanie says —

MELANIE

Goodness, you mean these perfectly

scrumptious men have to stay outside?

WIDER

 

Guards grin, Matron frowns, Melanie enters residence. The door closes in our face. A sign reads “V.I.P. SECURITY.”

SHOCK CUT TO:

EXT. SKY – (THE NEXT) DAY

HELICOPTER NOISE. Blades spin against sky.

CUT TO:

EXT. OVER JUNGLE – DAY – CONTINUOUS

Dense green jungle. Shadows of three moving helicopters.

CUT TO:

EXT. ANGLE UNDER HELICOPTERS – DAY – CONTINUOUS

Three big military helicopters in loose formation.

CUT TO:

INT./EXT. HELICOPTER – DAY – CONTINUOUS

BIG CLOSE UP MELANIE

 

Laughs delightedly. She’s “on,” “tweety,” all charm.

WIDER ANGLE

 

Big chopper, roomy, bare-bones. Melanie in G.I. coverall and army shoes signs a rifle butt. A high-heeled shoe juts from each of her coverall pockets. Four GUARDS and a CAPTAIN stand around her, charmed.

ANGLE ON TONY

 

Less charmed, garbed as usual, Tony sits on a coiled-up rope ladder by the door, sunglasses down.

MELANIE AND SOLDIERS

 

Melanie hands the rifle to a Guard.

MELANIE

There you go, honey.

GUARD

Gee, thanks.

(reads inscription)

Oh, gosh, Ms. Marlowe —

Melanie. I can’t carry a rifle

with that on the butt.

MELANIE

Honey, if I’d known it was your butt —

Melanie takes rifle, kisses butt. Soldiers react hilariously.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

So, captain, how much longer before

we get to —

TONY

 

throws a dangerous warning look at Melanie.

MELANIE AND SOLDIERS

 

MELANIE (Cont’d)

— wherever it is we’re going to?

I’m so anxious to show the boys. I

mean, do my show for the boys.

CAPTAIN

We’re pretty near it now, ma’am. We’ll

circle till our decoy lands.

MELANIE

Decoy?

Captain indicates another chopper. Melanie looks out window.

MELANIE’S POV/CHOPPER

 

–draws near. Carstairs, in sexy dress, waves to Melanie.

BACK IN MELANIE’S CHOPPER

 

CAPTAIN

Yes, ma’am, for your protection.

MELANIE

You’re going to make —

(catches herself)

I mean “let” that drag-queen steal

poor little Melanie’s thunder?

CAPTAIN

Well, ma’am, if there’s thunder,

I sure hope so.

Captain and Guards grin at Melanie’s naiveté.

TONY

That “drag-queen” risked his life

to save your ass.

A GUARD

Hey, not in front of a lady!

CAPTAIN

Watch it, Sunday.

TONY

I’m watching it. I just don’t

believe it.

MELANIE

I know what he’s doing, Tony-baby.

Soldiers react to Melanie’s calling Tony “baby.”

MELANIE (Cont’d)

But yesterday I didn’t know.

Tony and Melanie stare at each other. Tension breaks when —

ANGLE ON CABIN

 

— PILOT sticks his head around cabin door.

PILOT

Over destination, skipper.

BACK WITH PASSENGERS

 

MELANIE

We’re there?

CAPTAIN

Yes, ma’am. Down there’s Looing-

Fo Replacements Base.

Captain holds onto Melanie so she can look down on base.

MELANIE’S POV/LOOKING DOWN

EXT. OVER LOOING-FO – DAY – CONTINUOUS

 

A rambling, fenced collection of many buildings with watchtowers at three corners, and at fourth a conspicuous water tower. A horde of SOLDIERS CHEERS arrival of choppers.

BACK IN MELANIE’S CHOPPER

 

Melanie thinks fast. She looks at Tony, sitting on—

MELANIE’S POV/INSIDE CHOPPER

 

–coiled ladder.

MELANIE

 

She looks out door at —

MELANIE’S POV/THE DECOY CHOPPER

 

–where Carstairs stands waving to the troops, utterly exposed.

BACK TO MELANIE’S CHOPPER

 

MELANIE

My, this is just so exciting! I can’t

remember when I’ve been so exhilarated.

Just me all alone with all you brave men.

(Suddenly, sharply, to Tony)

You! Don’t you ever stand in the presence

of a lady?

The Guards guffaw as Tony stands with a mock-courteous bow.

TONY

Excuse me. I thought I was watching

some kind of show.

MELANIE

No sooner said than done.

Holding top rungs of ladder, Melanie waves, “bye-bye,” throws a kiss, and —

Melanie leaps from the helicopter!

LOOING-FO SOLDIERS’ POV/LOOKING UP

 

The three choppers. Melanie leaps from her chopper. The remainder of the rope ladder unreels, leaving Melanie swinging in space with many feet of ladder below her, ending just above Soldiers.

SOLDIERS

 

There’s a collective gasp.

BACK IN MELANIE’S CHOPPER

 

All inhabitants stand frozen, then lunge for door, almost pushing each other out. Tony stands on remaining ladder, preventing further release.

MELANIE’S POV/(LOOKING DOWN)

 

A thousand Soldiers gasp and then CHEER like you never heard!

MELANIE

swings in space, laughing at her own audacity, looks up.

MELANIE’S POV/(LOOKING UP)

Tony and Captain gape at Melanie.

TONY AND CAPTAIN

Motherfuck!

TONY’S POV/MELANIE

–smiles up at Tony over field of Soldiers.

MELANIE

Hey, watch the language. I’m a lady?

CARSTAIR’S CHOPPER

Carstairs gapes at Melanie’s deed, laughs, whips off his wig.

BEGIN INTERCUT

INTERCUT:

(A) Melanie climbing down ladder, grandstanding for Soldiers. Melanie takes high heels from pockets, kicks off her Army shoes, strips off coverall to reveal dazzling cocktail dress.

INTERCUT WITH

(B) Soldiers on field, running back and forth with Melanie’s shadow on them, cheering, waving Melanie to come on down, catching her shoes and coverall.

INTERCUT WITH

(C) Tony and Guards in chopper, trying to reel Melanie in.

INTERCUT WITH

(D) Captain and Pilot in ferocious confab.

INTERCUT WITH

(E) The helicopters overshooting the field and circling back.

INTERCUT WITH

(F) The decoy chopper. Carstairs shakes his head in admiration.

INTERCUT WITH

(G) BRASS on steps of Officer’s Mess at Looing-Fo, fairly scarlet with indignation.

IN MELANIE’S CHOPPER (TO BE INTERSPERSED IN INTERCUT)

PILOT

What should I do, skipper? By which

I mean, what the fuck should I do?

CAPTAIN

Take the day off.

TONY

We can’t reel her in. She’d get smashed

against the pontoons. Lower her down gently.

Trust the boys to catch her.

CAPTAIN

(To pilot)

You heard him. Sunday, you get full

responsibility for this. Enjoy it.

END INTERCUT

EXT. LOOING-FO – DAY – CONTINUOUS

Ladder swings just above the heads of the Soldiers. Melanie’s feet and legs are in view. Soldiers try to grab the ladder.

MELANIE

Take me! I’m yours!

Melanie lets go and falls into their arms. She’s in the cocktail dress, holding high-heeled shoes. Soldiers “body-surf” Melanie clear across the encampment as she laughs in delight.

FOLLOW MELANIE AND SOLDIERS

across the field. She floats on the palms of the Soldiers, across the camp and past a bandstand where MUSICIANS wait. Just behind the bandstand, Melanie is set upright before Brass on the steps of the Officer’s Mess. She stands, breathless but beautiful, before Brass’s collective condemnatory gaze. She smiles “tweetily” at them as she slips her shoes on. She looks up over their heads and sees a sign, “OFFICERS MESS.”

MELANIE

Well, I don’t know about you gentlemen,

but I’m famished. Who wants to mess

with a movie star?

Melanie offers her arm to HIGHEST-RANKING OFFICER. He helplessly takes it and leads her into Mess.

ANGLE ON HELIPAD

Even as Melanie’s chopper touches earth, Tony is out and fighting his way through the raucous Soldiers.

INT. – OFFICER’S MESS – DAY – CONTINUOUS

A long table, splendidly set. Officers stand by their chairs in stunned silence. An ORDERLY holds a chair for Melanie. Melanie sits and turns on the charm before Brass can speak.

MELANIE

You don’t know how that takes it out of

a girl. I hope there’s something for

lunch to put it back into her. Please sit,

gentlemen. I’m on at eleven hundred.

Officers grudgingly sit.

OFFICER

You’ll have time for lunch, Miss Marlowe.

MELANIE

I don’t believe in holding my openings.

OFFICER

We’re afraid show-time has leaked out.

MELANIE

Jinkies, I wonder how?

OFFICER

So we’ve delayed it to 1400 hours.

MELANIE

Oh we have, have we?

OFFICER

In fact, we may have decided to cancel

it altogether.

MELANIE

I’m just picturing you in the altogether.

OFFICER

Miss Marlowe.

MELANIE

Oh, please, you may call me “Ms.”

OFFICER

(just about fed up)

Miss Marlowe. After this ridiculous

breach of security —

MELANIE

Don’t worry about the security of my

breach, Sergeant.

OFFICER

Colonel.

MELANIE

Whatever. There are people out there

waiting for this show. It’s important.

OFFICER

There are things more important than

a cooch-show, Miss Marlowe.

MELANIE

(to Orderly)

What time is it, sugar?

ORDERLY

Uh – ten fifty-six, Ms. Marlowe.

MELANIE

I love you, sugar.

(stands)

Sorry to not-eat and run. Eat each other.

Melanie stalks toward door. Officers gawk, then stand to pursue.

OFFICER

Miss Marlowe!

MELANIE

Miss my ass!

(to Orderly)

Sorry, sugar. You I like.

Melanie shoves the Orderly at the Brass. Brass fall over. She makes the door. Tony is just coming in. Melanie grabs his arm.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

Come on. The service is lousy.

Melanie swings Tony out the door before he can speak.

EXT. OUTSIDE THE OFFICERS’ MESS — DAY — CONTINUOUS

Melanie comes out of the Officers’ Mess and drags the startled Tony through a mob of Soldiers which opens before and closes after Melanie and Tony.

The Brass emerges from the Officers Mess and runs up against the backs of the crowd of Soldiers.

FOLLOW TONY AND MELANIE THROUGH CROWD

TONY

You could have been killed.

MELANIE

Beverly Hills Debutante Gymnastics

Champion.

TONY

What do you think you’re doing?

MELANIE

A matinee!

Soldiers help Melanie and Tony up wooden steps onto the bandstand prepared for her show.

ONSTAGE

Melanie drags Tony past waiting Musicians. In passing, she clicks “on” such electric instruments and loudspeakers as she passes. FEEDBACK HOWLS. There is an answering HOWL from —

EXT. THE STAGE – DAY – CONTINUOUS

— the vast mob of Soldiers ranked as far as the eye can see, waiting for the show. In b.g. the water tower is conspicuous.

ANGLE ON STEPS

The Brass makes its way through Soldiers to the steps, and would climb them, but they are stopped by the CHEERS of the Soldiers as –

ONSTAGE

Melanie comes into full view, leading Tony. The wall of SOUND from Soldiers terrifies him. He holds back. She turns to him.

MELANIE

Welcome to my world.

Tony breaks her grip and flees. Melanie shrugs. She shades her eyes and scans the Soldiers as if looking for a replacement.

MELANIE’S POV/THE SOLDIERS

Soldiers, of course, stand, SCREAM, “Me! Me!”

ANGLE ON STEPS

Tony reaches steps, faces angry Brass, retreats to stand by a Drummer and watch the show.

ONSTAGE

Melanie mimes not being able to choose and spreads her arms to embrace all the Soldiers. As they CHEER even louder, if possible, Melanie goes to a mike and taps it. It’s on.

MELANIE

Testes! Testes! Are you there?

They tried to make me eat with the

brass, but I told ’em, “I’d rather

mess with your privates.” Band?

BAND MEMBERS

Here, Melanie.

MELANIE

Watch my rear.

As APPLAUSE dies down, Melanie chats with Soldiers over mike.

MELANIE

Where are you fellas from?

They SHOUT hundreds of town and state names.

MELANIE

You know where I’m from?

A SOLDIER

Heaven!

MELANIE

If I am, I’m a long way from home.

We all are. A long ways from where

we’d like to be, where we ought to be,

where we could be if we all worked together.

Soldiers sense her seriousness, become quiet as she speaks on.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

No one can know the respect and the

gratitude I feel for all you boys —

for ALL boys fighting strangers far

from home — or even those who are near home, caught in a war we all just wish would end.

Melanie turns to face Tony upstage.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

That’s why I’m here, if you’d like

to know. Because I really care

about, really love you.

TONY

Baffled, as you may imagine.

Turns to face Audience again.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

And you! And you! And you!

ANGLE UPSTAGE — TONY AND BRASS

OFFICER

Is she always this unpredictable?

TONY

I don’t know. I don’t know

what the hell she’s doing.

SOLDIERS

CHEER.

ONSTAGE

Melanie backs ‘way upstage until she’s by Tony. With a straight face, she grabs Tony’s arm and checks his watch.

MELANIE

Okay, we’ve got one minute.

Melanie struts back downstage, out of frame.

TONY

Till what?

TONY’S POV/SCAN CAMP

Tony scans the jungled hills, the water-tower, the enthralled Soldiers, Melanie trying to hush them. His gaze ends on –

THE CHOPPER CREWS

— including Carstairs, wig off and an Army coat over his shoulders, but still in make-up and drag, enjoying the show.

BACK TO TONY

Anxiety, suspicion, frustration, irritation.

ONSTAGE

Melanie kneels to talk to ringside Soldier.

MELANIE

(holding boy’s hand)

Where you from, angel-eyes?

SOLDIER

Uh — Corpus Christi, Texas, ma’am.

MELANIE

(examines boy’s watch)

And what time is it in Uh-Corpus-Christi?

SOLDIER

Uh – ah – fifteen hours earlier, ma’am.

MELANIE

Well, that means it’s eight last

night there, then, because —

(portentously)

— it’s precisely eleven a.m. here,

so I guess it’s just — about — time —

for — me — to —

ANGLE UPSTAGE

Tony, anxious, runs up on stage. FOLLOW TONY up to mike where

Melanie says —

MELANIE (Cont’d)

(tweety)

— sing a song for you!

Tony screeches to a stop onstage, feeling rather foolish. Melanie makes Tony a part of the act.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

What’s a matter, Tony? Got a request?

This is Tony Sunday, guys. Tony guards

my body. Ooooooo. They just couldn’t

find anyone else willing to take on the job!

Tony would leave. Melanie gently restrains him.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

I make Tony want to go. Funny — I usually

have the opposite effect on men. Tony wants to

protect me — I don’t know from what.

I guess he’s just supposed to be with me

in case anything comes down.

(lets a strap fall)

So I’ll just dedicate this song to

Tony, my constant companion.

(for benefit of Musicians)

Tony, “Make A Date With Me?”

Soldiers HOWL. This is clearly a signature song of Melanie’s.

To Tony’s embarrassment, Melanie sings to him:

MELANIE

(sings)

Come on, cutie, make a date with me.

Name the time and place.

Any other guy would eagerly

Get right in my face.

Don’t be indefinite, don’t be late.

Let’s get something firm and straight.

Between us. For Heaven’s sake,

Make a date with me!

Melanie releases the humiliated Tony, who escapes upstage. Melanie does a little dance between choruses. She begins to sing again, stumbling awkwardly on some lyrics.

MELANIE

Come on, beauty, make a date with me.

Let’s see, where shall we meet?

Don’t be mean to Melanie.

Uh – I don’t know the names of these camp streets.

(dances briefly)

UPSTAGE

Tony overhears as Drummer talks with Bassist.

DRUMMER

What’s that, special material? Or

is she losing it?

BASSIST

Never heard those words before. I

think she’s improvising.

Tony perks up his ears.

ONSTAGE

Melanie, dancing, looks all around, obviously gets an idea.

MELANIE

(sings)

Oh, I’ve got the spot. I’ve got the hour!

Midnight on the dot! By the water tower!

Melanie starts dancing freely, as if released.

UPSTAGE

Tony looks hard from —

TONY’S POV/SCAN

— the camp water tower, to Carstairs, to Melanie.

TONY

desperately tries to put two and two together as

MELANIE

carries on.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

Don’t give in to doubt.

Three strikes and you’re out!

Soldiers SING tag-line along with Melanie.

MELANIE AND SOLDIERS

Don’t give in to doubt.

Three strikes and you’re out, etc.

Melanie dances with a pleased, secretive look on her face, free as a bird.

CUT BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN TONY AND MELANIE

Melanie gives Tony private glances as she dances.

Tony is baffled. What exactly is Melanie up to?

FADE OUT. EXT. GUEST’S QUARTERS, LOOING-FO – (THAT) NIGHT

Barbed wire fence. A sign that reads “LOOING-FO BASE GUEST QUARTERS.” A GUARD stands watch. The Guest Quarters consists of a long Quonset hut. One window is lit. Simultaneously, WE HEAR:

MELANIE (VO)

I did not say that.

TONY (VO)

Yes, you did!

MELANIE (VO)

I did not. I did not.

TONY (VO)

You most certainly did!

CUT TO:

 

INT. GUEST QUARTERS – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

BIG CLOSE UP – MELANIE

Melanie’s without make-up, hair tied starkly back.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

I did not say that this is a prison.

I said it has certain characteristics

in common with a prison!

JUMP BACK TO REVEAL

dismal room in the Quonset hut. Minimal accommodations. Melanie sits on bed in pajamas. Tony paces back and forth. They’ve been arguing a while.

 

TONY

Do you have any idea what kind of

trouble you can cause talking like that?

MELANIE

(some concern)

Trouble for you, Tony?

TONY

Don’t flatter yourself you could make

trouble for me.

MELANIE

(sincerely)

Good. I wouldn’t want that. Honest.

TONY

Nobody would blame me for anything unless

you got away from here —

MELANIE

Aha! “Got away!” It is a prison and you

know it!

TONY

No, it is a war!

MELANIE

It is supposedly a war against tyranny and

oppression, and yet the alleged champions

of freedom restrict me against my will!

TONY

Well, Jesus, God, Allah, Confucius, and Buddha!

You mean there’s some place where you can’t do

just what you want to every livelong minute? Stop the press! Declare a miracle! Issue a stamp!

CUT TO:

INT. HALLWAY OF GUEST QUARTERS – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

A young GUARD stands watch at Melanie’s door. With him, WE HEAR MELANIE AND TONY quarreling, but no words are clear. Guard looks bewildered.

CUT TO:

INT. MELANIE’S QUARTERS – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

TONY

That shit you pulled today! You could

have got yourself killed.

MELANIE

Oh, nonsense. They’re not out to kill me.

TONY

(leaping on it)

They who? How do you know?

Melanie realizes she’s slipped, retreats to safer ground.

MELANIE

You just think I’m a spoiled brat.

TONY

You don’t know what I think, and yes,

you are!

MELANIE

All my life I’ve been imprisoned.

My parents, producers, the studio!

YOU should understand.

TONY

You Beverly Hills bitch! You dare compare

your Freudian fantasyland with the fucking

nightmare my people live in?

Melanie reacts with painful pity to his mention of “my people.” She conceals her pity. Then she gets an idea.

MELANIE

(considering a scheme)

Tony… do you have any relatives left?

TONY

(too angry to get wise)

I got relatives left, I got relatives

right, I got relatives in the middle

of the road — under tank treads!

MELANIE

Anyone who would miss you?

TONY

Everyone’s missed so far. That’s

why I’m alive.

MELANIE

You don’t know anything about me!

TONY

I know ‘way more about you than you

know about real life!

MELANIE

Then show me! Quit beating me up and

show me!

(turns on the tears)

Quit punishing me for being born rich

and famous and beautiful and lucky!

TONY

Hey, don’t. Don’t do that. Come on.

Melanie weeps. Tony sits on bed beside Melanie.

MELANIE

Look, get me out of this asylum for an

hour, okay? Despite what I said about

imprisonment, I was never actually locked

up like this. It’s got me looney.

TONY

You poor kid. You got demons inside

you too, don’t you? You know what you

do? You hide them too well. Hey,

maybe you really can act.

MELANIE

Of course I can act. You don’t think

anybody’s actually tweety, do you?

(man-to-man)

Look, you know this camp. You probably

even know the jungle, right? You’d be

safe, no matter what?

TONY

I done some smuggling, yeah.

MELANIE

Let’s get out and see the camp.

TONY

(musing)

There’s no action around here…

MELANIE

I’m not looking for sex!

TONY

I mean no enemy action. That’s why the

replacement base is here. But I could

probably scare up an all-night poker

game for you.

MELANIE

Oh, that would be so much fun! Let’s

do that! Where do you suppose they play?

In the barracks? In the cook house?

Melanie’s being adorable. Tony’s buying it, until she adds —

MELANIE (Cont’d)

Under the water tower?

It comes together for Tony. He manages to cover his reaction to Melanie’s “slip”.

TONY

Maybe…

MELANIE

(too quickly)

Or wherever. Let me get dressed.

Melanie hops up and grabs clothes.

Tony ponders a scheme of his own.

TONY

Yeah. I’ll go work it. We should

hurry. It’s nearly midnight.

MELANIE

(just reacts to this)

Is it? I’ll hurry.

TONY

(at door)

You do that. I’ll be right back.

INT. THE HALLWAY BEFORE MELANIE’S ROOM – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

GUARD present. Tony comes out of Melanie’s room. Guard snaps to. Tony closes door.

TONY

Hey, how ya doin’?

GUARD

Fine, SIR!

TONY

Lay off. I’m hired help. Have a smoke.

(offers cigarettes)

GUARD

On duty, SIR!

Tony continues to hold the cigarette pack throughout scene.

TONY

Please, “Tony.”

GUARD

(flattered)

Tony.

TONY

Look, you could be the boy I’m lookin’

for. I need a friend. Know what I mean?

GUARD

No, sir. Tony.

TONY

Sure you do. You like Miss Marlowe?

GUARD

Oh, crap, she’s beautiful. Sir. Tony.

TONY

Well, I’m gonna tell you somethin’ man-to-man.

Get me?

GUARD

No – Tony, sir.

TONY

Sure you do. Here in this alien land,

Miss Marlowe is feelin’ lonely, understand?

GUARD

Not absolutely.

TONY

God, you’re gonna get this outa me, ain’t cha?

See, if I can get alone with Miss Marlowe, I

think I can get in there. You understand, right?

GUARD

Sure, crap, I understand that.

TONY

But as you’ve figured out for yourself, Miss

Marlowe, due to her celebrity, is shy of having

people know when she is up to what we’re talkin’ about. Understand?

GUARD

Oh, crap, sure.

TONY

So if you could have a small call of nature

for, say, an hour..?

GUARD

Oh, crap, I don’t know…

TONY

I might not need the whole hour, it being

the most beautiful woman in the world

salivatin’ for it right inside that door…

Guard hesitates, torn. Tony closes in for the kill.

TONY (Cont’d)

And she’s gonna want somethin’ else for the

remainder of that hour. Do you follow me?

You. Follow. Me.

GUARD

Me and Melanie Marlowe? Crap!

TONY

Hey, don’t lose it now. You’ll need it.

GUARD

If the captain of the guard came by —

TONY

We’ll fit ‘im in. You know what these

Hollywood women are like.

GUARD

My mama always said.

TONY

Mama was right.

GUARD

Crap. Where would I go?

TONY

(indicates across the hall)

My room’s right there.

GUARD

Crap. I could wait there. If you’re

sure.

Tony punches top of cigarette pack.

TONY

Okay. Got that on tape.

GUARD

What did you —

TONY

(displays cigarette pack)

C.I.A. issue. Neat, hey?

GUARD

You got me on tape saying —

Tony pockets cigarette case.

TONY

–you’d leave your post in wartime, right.

Now shall we talk?

GUARD’S FACE

Guard is red, terrified, stymied under his helmet.

GUARD

Crap.

MATCH CUT TO:

INT. TONY’S ROOM – NIGHT – (A FEW MINUTES) LATER

GUARD’S FACE

Sad, terrified, without helmet.

PULL BACK THROUGH DOOR INTO HALLWAY TO REVEAL

Guard sits naked on bed. Tony at door holds Guard’s uniform bundled in his arms.

TONY

Get yourself ready, kid. These stars

ain’t used to waitin’ for that Oscar.

Tony closes door, crosses hallway to Melanie’s door, knocks.

MELANIE (VO)

No autographs.

TONY

It’s for my little girl with asthma.

Melanie opens door. She’s wearing jeans and plaid shirt.

TONY

Got your party duds, Cinderella.

Tony enters, closes door.

CUT TO:

EXT. GUEST QUARTERS – GATE – NIGHT – (A LITTLE) LATER

GATE GUARD at his post. Melanie, in other Guard’s uniform, doing a very good characterization, walks past him.

MELANIE (Male voice)

Crap, they’ll be screwin’ all night.

Want coffee?

GATE GUARD

Got a joint, thanks.

Melanie goes. Gate Guard shakes his head. These Hollywood people!

Tony saunters down walk past Gate Guard.

TONY

Gotta go refuel. Want coffee?

GATE GUARD

Got a joint. Thanks, Tony.

Tony saunters away. Gate Guard shakes his head.

CUT TO:

EXT. CAMP GROUNDS – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

Dark, silent, deserted. Melanie waits, plastered to a wall. Tony appears, grabs her hand, shushes her. They run away.

FOLLOW TONY AND MELANIE

as they dart and dodge. FEATURE Tony confidently pointing the way for Melanie like a bragging boy. All very fun and innocent.

CUT TO:

EXT. DARK CORNER OF CAMP – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

A structure of posts and trestles. Could be under the water tower but isn’t. Fence visible past structure. Bushes beyond. Tony and Melanie scuttle to hide among posts. Melanie GIGGLES. Tony SHUSHES her. They hunker on the ground. They WHISPER.

MELANIE

Crap, that was fun.

TONY

Fun’s just beginning.

MELANIE

Is this the water tower?

TONY

Sorry, no poker game.

MELANIE

(checks Tony’s watch)

We don’t have much time.

TONY

Whatever do you mean?

Melanie takes off helmet, starts shedding uniform. Plaid shirt and jeans under it. Tony takes cigarettes from shirt-pocket.

MELANIE

Well, that boy will get wise eventually.

TONY

Not during this administration.

What are you doing?

MELANIE

Getting comfortable.

TONY

(gets cigarette in mouth)

What for?

MELANIE

You’ve been wonderful to me.

TONY

I pimp for a living.

MELANIE

(shakes famous hair free)

May I audition?

TONY

(fumbles for lighter)

I’m not hiring right now.

MELANIE

I want you to remember me.

Melanie snuggles close to Tony. Quite close. Tony fumbles with “Bic lighter” (actually a pack of gum).

TONY

I don’t hire amateurs.

MELANIE

I make you nervous, don’t I?

TONY

In your dreams.

MELANIE

Then why are you trying to light that

cigarette with a pack of gum?

Tony throws gum away, takes out lighter.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

Here, let Melanie.

Melanie lights Tony’s cigarette. Tony draws on it, staring at Melanie. Melanie clicks lighter three times.

TONY

What are you up to?

MELANIE

I’m up to three.

Melanie clicks lighter again, three times.

TONY

What’s our time frame?

MELANIE

Close to midnight. Kiss me before

I turn into a pumpkin.

Melanie clicks lighter again. Tony grabs her hand, roughly.

TONY

Fuck me before I turn into a bumpkin.

What happens at midnight under the water tower?

MELANIE

(struggling)

You get a lot of drips? What do you mean?

TONY

I mean whoever you were planning to meet

is fucked in a whole new way.

MELANIE

(stops struggling)

My, my, my.

TONY

Your boyfriend will have to make himself

at home. We are under a guard tower, at

the opposite corner of the base from the

water tower.

CUT TO:

EXT. GUARD TOWER – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

On stilts high above the ground. Two GUARDS wearing Walkmen are not about to hear anything whispered right under them.

CUT TO:

EXT. UNDER THE GUARD TOWER – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

TONY

You were sending out signals to someone

today. Who? And for what?

MELANIE

(fondly, sadly)

Oh, Tony, I was sending out mixed

signals. You got the wrong one.

Remember? “Three strikes?”

Melanie clicks Bic three times. Tony grabs the lighter, angrily, shoves it into his pocket. O.S. RUSTLING IN BUSHES.

MELANIE(cont’d)

And unfortunately, you’re out.

TONY

You fucked-up Hollywood —

A gloved hand covers Tony’s mouth.

QUICK SERIES OF BIG CLOSE-UPS OF TONY AND MELANIE

MELANIE

Another gloved hand covers Melanie’s mouth.

TONY

blinks in surprise.

MELANIE

looks at Tony.

TONY

struggles.

MELANIE

has eyes only for Tony.

TONY

struggles.

MELANIE

bites hand over her mouth. It is removed for a second.

MELANIE

Don’t hurt him!

Hand muffles Melanie’s mouth again.

TONY

gives Melanie a quizzical glance before something knocks him out.

CROSS-DISSOLVE TO:

INT. REBEL TENT – NIGHT – (SOME HOURS) LATER

BIG CLOSE UP

MELANIE

Tony? Tony?

ANGLE ON TONY

bound, on dirt floor of tent, tethered loosely to tent pole. He comes to.

WIDER ON TONY AND MELANIE

Tony lies against tent post. Melanie squats beside him, cleans his face. Legs of TWO REBEL SOLDIERS (TENT GUARDS) behind Melanie.

TONY

What in Hell are you doing?

MELANIE

I in Hell am worrying about you.

TONY

Where, when, what, who, how, why?

MELANIE

They weren’t supposed to take you.

Don’t worry. You won’t be harmed.

TONY

I been hit on the head. I been harmed.

MELANIE

They don’t want you.

TONY

How do they treat people they do

want? They who?

SOUND OF TENT FLAP. CAMP NOISES O.S. briefly increase. Tent Guards’ legs snap to attention. Tony turns his head to see —

TONY’S POV/REBEL LEADER

–including Tent Guards. REBEL LEADER enters tent. He’s an uglier-than-usual customer.

TONY

TONY

Oh, shit, the ruttin’ rebels. We’re

raped and dismembered.

TONY’S POV/REBEL LEADER’S HANDS

–take hold of Melanie’s shoulders.

TONY

Tony screams and throws himself about.

TONY

No, goddamit, no! Leave her the

fuck alone!

WIDER ON WHOLE GROUP

Tent Guard raises rifle to bonk Tony with its butt. Melanie sternly grabs Tent Guard’s arm.

MELANIE

No!

(To Rebel Leader)

No harm is to come to him.

REBEL LEADER

Okay. Sorry, Tony.

MELANIE

(to Rebel Leader)

Just so that’s understood. Let’s go.

A Tent Guard holds back tent flap. ROWDY CAMP NOISES O.S. Rebel Leader goes to flap and beckons Melanie to follow him.

TONY

Wait! What are you doing? Where

are you going? You don’t know what

these animals are. They crucify their captives!

TONY’S POV/MELANIE’S FACE

–beautiful, caring. Her hand caresses Tony’s face.

MELANIE

Don’t worry about me, Tony. I’m not

a captive…

Melanie stands, revealing that she wears Rebel uniform.

MELANIE (cont’d)

…I’m a defector.

Melanie, Rebel Leader, and Soldiers leave. Tent flap closes behind them.

ANGLE ON TONY

Tony is stunned, trying to think of a comeback to that. Tony rolls over as near to tent flap as his tether allows. He can just reach far enough to lie on his belly and see under flap —

TONY’S POV/UNDER FLAP

EXT. REBEL CAMP – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

tents around a flickering campfire. RAUCOUS CAMP NOISES. REBELS move about in obvious busy preparations for something.

Melanie and Rebel Leader stand with TWO REBEL SOLDIERS who hold TWO BUDDHIST PRIESTS by their arms. The two Tent Guards stand with the group, rifles ready. Melanie and Rebel Leader TALK heatedly. Their words cannot be distinguished.

TONY

trying to hear and see.

TONY’S POV/UNDER FLAP

Melanie’s conversation with the Rebel Leader grows more heated. The Tent Guards grab her. Rebel Soldiers drag Priests away. OTHER REBEL SOLDIERS follow. Tent Guards drag Melanie away. She screams:

MELANIE

No! Don’t! You can’t do this!

This wasn’t in the bargain!

You two-timing, welching son of a

bitch! You can’t do this! This is

inhuman!

Tent Guards drag Melanie out of sight, still screaming.

TONY

struggles futilely against his bonds.

TONY

Melanie! Melanie!

MELANIE (O.S.)

Tony! Don’t let them do this! Help

me! Stop them! Help me!

BACK TO TONY’S POV/UNDER FLAP

Rebel Leader stares O.S. where Melanie and Priests have gone. He glances briefly at Tony, then follows Melanie and Priests, yells:

REBEL LEADER

Tie them to the stakes!

Rebel Leader walks out of frame. All the Rebels in the camp follow him, YELLING with fiendish glee. MELANIE’S VOICE continues VO, incoherent to Tony and us.

TONY

struggles, screams.

TONY

Melanie! Melanie! You hurt her and

I’ll eat your gizzards! Melanie!

REBEL LEADER (O.S.)

Ready. Aim. Fire!

BARRAGE OF GUNFIRE

TONY

stops, stunned, then thrashes, only tangling himself in tether.

TONY

Bastards! Fuckers! Murderers!

Son-of-a-bitching prehistoric,

shit-eating —

Tony’s tirade is cut short as a FIGURE in Rebel uniform seems to leap through the tent flaps at him, striking him full force.

Tony and the Figure roll about on the dirt floor.

TONY (Cont’d)

You don’t kill me that easy, you

pus-sucking, baby-buggering, nun-

raping, garbage-brained —

The Figure detaches itself from Tony. It’s Melanie, looking messy. Melanie starts instantly to work on Tony’s ropes.

MELANIE

Keep talking. They deserve it.

TONY

You’re alive!

MELANIE

They shot the priests!

TONY

What priests?

MELANIE

Shut up! How does this come undone?

TONY

Knife. In my pocket. Cigarette

lighter.

Melanie quizzically takes out Tony’s cigarette lighter.

TONY

Make the flame higher.

Melanie turns the little flame-height dial. A blade snaps out of the bottom of the lighter. Melanie blinks, but instantly starts cutting Tony’s ropes.

MELANIE

Cute. They didn’t take it.

TONY

They’re soldiers. They’re stupid.

(gets a hand free)

Gimme that.

(takes knife, saws)

MELANIE

Let me help.

Melanie takes switchblade from her pants, helps cut Tony’s bonds.

Tony is surprised by the knife.

TONY

Where’d you get that?

MELANIE

While they were dragging me. They’re

soldiers. They’re stupid.

TONY

(freed, shakes off ropes)

Who were the priests?

MELANIE

Later. Lock arms.

Melanie holds out her right arm. Tony automatically links it with his left. Melanie has her knife in her left hand, Tony has his in his right. Melanie nods at —

ANGLE ON FRONT TENT WALL

— the shadows of two Tent Guards.

MELANIE

MELANIE (cont’d)

Aim for the nape of the neck.

TONY

looks at Guards’ shadows, looks at his and Melanie’s knives, obviously poised to stab Guards, looks at

MELANIE

MELANIE (cont’d)

They shot the priests.

WIDER

Tony hesitates only for a second, then nods in agreement. Tony and Melanie barrel forward, knives poised at neck height.

CUT TO:

EXT. THE TENT – CONTINUOUS

The Tent Guards flanking the tent flap suddenly jerk, jerk again, fall silently.

BACK IN THE TENT

Tony and Melanie give one more jab, withdraw their knives. Tony looks at Melanie for an instant. Melanie wipes her knife clean on her pants and stows it. Tony shrugs and does the same. They peek out tent-flap.

TONY AND MELANIE’S POV/CAMP

SCREAMING Rebels drag Priests’ bodies away. No one is looking at a dinky prisoners’ tent.

CUT TO:

EXT. TENT – CONTINUOUS

In foreground, last few Rebels run right past tent.

CLOSER ON

front of tent. Melanie (remember she’s wearing Rebel uniform) emerges. She quickly puts on dead Guard’s cap to hide her face. She takes dead Guards’ ammo belts. Tony emerges and takes their guns. Tony looks nervously where Rebels have gone, then longingly in opposite direction. He holds out his hand for Melanie’s. She takes a rifle. She strips jacket and cap off one Guard, slaps cap on Tony. She shoves Guard’s jacket at Tony, and starts off other way than Rebels into jungle. Tony follows her.

CUT TO:

EXT. THE JUNGLE – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

Moonlit and scary. Distant CRIES OF REBELS O.S. Tony and Melanie crash through vegetation. Tony struggles into Rebel jacket, Melanie into ammo belts. FOLLOW THEM into comparative safety of some bushes. Melanie points off.

MELANIE

Okay. Looing-Fo is that way?

TONY

Yeah. Come on. Let’s go.

MELANIE

Get on back to Looing-Fo, Tony.

You’ll be okay. You know the jungle.

TONY

What are you talking about?

MELANIE

We won’t be safe here for long.

Get going.

TONY

Leave you here?

MELANIE

I know what I’m doing.

REBEL CRIES O.S. grow LOUDER and NEARER.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

Don’t be difficult.

TONY

I’m staying with you….I’ve

been paid.

He shows his clip. She shrugs and heads back toward camp.

TONY

(hoarse whisper)

Melanie, that’s the way back to the camp!

Tony runs after Melanie.

CUT TO:

EXT. BEHIND PRISONERS’ TENT – NIGHT – SECONDS LATER

Melanie crawls on ground behind tent. Rebel CRIES O.S. very near. Tony comes out of brush, sees Melanie and tent.

TONY

This is insane.

With a jerk, Melanie drags Tony down beside her, shushes him.

ANGLE BEHIND TONY AND MELANIE

Tony and Melanie lie behind tent. Shadows of Rebel Leader and Soldiers on tent wall. Tony flinches. Melanie whops Tony.

REBEL LEADER (O.S.)

She’s gone! The Hollywood whore

is loose! Find her!

Shadows leave tent.

TONY AND MELANIE

Melanie starts crawling under tent wall to get into tent. Tony grabs Melanie’s leg.

TONY

What are you doing?

MELANIE

It’s the one place they won’t

look for us.

Tony makes face which admits this is clever thinking. Tony lets go Melanie’s leg and scuttles in after her.

CUT TO:

INT. PRISONER’S TENT – CONTINUOUS

Melanie crawls into tent, stands. Tony scuttles in after her, stands.

MELANIE

Shush.

Melanie peeps through tent flap.

EXT. TENT – CONTINUOUS

Melanie peeps through flap. She ignores Guards’ bodies.

MELANIE’S POV/CAMP

Soldiers run off in all directions, leaving camp deserted.

IN TENT

Tony pulls Melanie back from flap.

MELANIE

Okay, I think the radio tent is directly across from us.

TONY

We don’t need it. I’ll get you back.

MELANIE

Go back yourself, unless you can run

a radio better than I can.

TONY

You’re insane. Everyone monitors all

frequencies.

MELANIE

Ever hear of code?

EXT. TENT – CONTINUOUS

Melanie, clutching gun, whizzes out of tent across camp.

INT. TENT – CONTINUOUS

Tony stands with his hand empty where he was supposed to be clutching Melanie. He blinks, looks at gun in other hand.

He shakes his head violently, dismisses the whole situation, heads for back of tent. Stops.

TONY

Oh, Christ, she has the ammunition!

CUT TO:

INT. RADIO TENT – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

Primitive. RADIOMAN sits on floor with earphones on amidst sparse radio equipment. He looks up.

RADIOMAN’S POV/TENT FLAP

Melanie, cap over face, bursts in brandishing gun.

RADIOMAN

looks up, reaches for gun on the floor.

RADIOMAN’S POV/MELANIE

–whips off cap, loosing her famous hair, smiles.

WIDER

Radioman hesitates. Melanie whams gun butt on his head, dons earphones. A hand grabs her shoulder. She swings gun. Tony jumps over gun and kneels. She hands him earphones.

MELANIE

He was listening to Guns and Roses.

TONY

He’s suffered enough.

MELANIE

Run this thing?

TONY

First tell me why.

Melanie raises her gun, but Tony’s is in her face first. Pause.

MELANIE

To alert my rescue team.

TONY

Tell me more. Start with who.

MELANIE

(pause)

It’s the Thainians.

TONY

Tell me why.

MELANIE

They bought me from the Rebels.

The priests were my escort.

TONY

Tell me what went wrong?

MELANIE

They wanted more money.

TONY

The rebels?

MELANIE

The priests. Help me.

TONY

Tell me why I should.

MELANIE

To save our lives.

TONY

I can save myself.

MELANIE

Out of pity for me?

TONY

I am out of pity for you.

MELANIE

…To get the rest of the story?

TONY

Deal. Who do I call?

MELANIE

Frequency seventeen seventy-six.

TONY

Cute. What do I use? Morse?

MELANIE

Voice. Say, “Same song, second verse.”

TONY

(shoves mike at her)

You say.

MELANIE

Tell me why.

TONY

I prefer to remain nonpolitical.

MELANIE

(into mike)

Same song, second verse. Same

song, second verse.

TONY

How do they acknowledge?

MELANIE

They meet me at a rendezvous.

TONY

Which is…?

MELANIE

Mak-Vo Mountain.

TONY

(wryly)

Dandy.

MELANIE

Let’s move.

TONY

Let’s not.

MELANIE

We can’t stay here. They’ll kill you.

TONY

Please. They know and love me.

Why would they kill me?

MELANIE

Because you raped me.

TONY

I never.

MELANIE

I’ll say you did.

TONY

Why would they care?

MELANIE

They don’t get paid if I’m raped.

TONY

You’re vicious.

MELANIE

Hollywood.

Melanie stands, quite confident, goes to tent flap.

MELANIE

Coming?

TONY

(rises)

In my pants.

EXT. RADIO TENT – CONTINUOUS

Melanie and Tony come out of tent. REBEL VOICES O.S. in jungle.

TONY

Game plan?

MELANIE

Keep your face down and act like

you’re looking for me.

A few Rebel Soldiers criss-cross the clearing on search. Tony and Melanie merge with Rebels and disappear into the jungle.

CUT TO:

EXT. THE JUNGLE – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS

Tony and Melanie move through the jungle. Rebel Soldiers flit past in all directions, waving flashlights and SHOUTING.

REBEL SOLDIERS

(variously)

Not here! Over here! Look here!

It’s a nightmare of identical Soldiers in the brush. Tony and Melanie run among them. We can’t tell them from Soldiers.

TONY

stops, crouches to reconnoiter. Tony holds out his hand and grabs another hand. A flashlight strikes Tony’s face.

REBEL SOLDIER

whose hand Tony holds.

REBEL SOLDIER

Ah!

(grunts)

Aaaaaaah.

Soldier falls to reveal Melanie, who’s gun-butted him. She holds out her hand. Tony takes it and they flee through the bewildering search party. Soldiers cross in every direction.

CROSS-DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. ESTABLISHING – MAK-VO MOUNTAIN – (NEXT) DAY

Dawn. Hoary mountain thrusting out of jungle.

CUT TO:

EXT. PATH ON MAK-VO MOUNTAIN – CONTINUOUS

FOLLOW TONY AND MELANIE

Tony leads Melanie up winding path through thick overgrowth. They’re tired, dirty, dragging guns.

MELANIE

I’m afraid of booby traps.

TONY

Do you know what Mak-Vo means?

MELANIE

Do I need to know what Mak-Vo means?

TONY

It means “Liberty Mountain.” There were whorehouses here. It was a “combat-free zone.” Probably no booby-traps.

MELANIE

You know it well?

TONY

I was probably born here.

MELANIE

Do you have any relatives left?

TONY

I got relatives left, I got relatives

right, relatives in the middle of the road —

MELANIE

— because both sides are probably booby-trapped?

TONY

Listen, get me kidnapped, get me beat

to shit, ruin my independent reputation,

but nobody steps on my jokes.

STOP as Tony and Melanie come to —

EXT. CLEARING – CONTINUOUS

— a large, dilapidated hut, once a bar, stands with an old sign hanging half-loose, reading “LIBERTY BAR” in several languages.

TONY

Okay, we’re here. Now what?

Melanie becomes urgent, nervous, wary.

MELANIE

Now you cut out. I’m safe. Please, go.

TONY

I think not. You promised me the

whole story.

MELANIE

You’ll know soon. Please leave.

TONY

You don’t know my whole story, either.

MELANIE

What does that mean?

Tony grabs Melanie, expertly disarms her, holds gun to her head.

MELANIE (Cont’d)

Tony!

TONY

You may call me, “Bastard.”

(yells)

Okay, all-y all-y out can come in

free! Show yo-selves or the bananas

get spattered with bimbo brains!

TONY’S POV/JUNGLE

Out of the bushes appear a couple of dozen SOLDIERS FROM ALL SIDES, except Rebels, all with drawn weapons. All wear their own uniforms, plus an armband with an Oriental insignia on it.

TONY

looks at Melanie with satisfaction.

TONY

Why, it’s a Rainbow Coalition! Nice to

see all you fellas playing together.

But what are we playing?

LOUD NOISE O.S. draws Tony’s attention.

CUT BACK TO REVEAL:

The walls and roof of the bar building shake, send dust billowing, then fall off and blow away to reveal a huge helicopter, its blades starting to spin. The helicopter bears the same Oriental insignia as the Soldiers’ armbands.

TONY AND MELANIE

TONY

Your magic carpet, I believe.

Take off your belt and tie us together.

(at her hesitation)

To use a tiresome television cliché: “Just do it!”

Melanie obeys, binds one of her wrists to Tony’s free one.

WIDER

Soldiers make as if to advance, but

TONY

presses his gun against Melanie’s head, and the

SOLDIERS

step back like the monsters in the hive in “Aliens.”

TONY AND MELANIE

Once he’s bound to Melanie —

TONY

(to soldiers)

Okay, take me to your leader. Or

better yet, bring your leader to me.

I’m bushed.

TONY’S POV/HELICOPTER

CHIANG

TONY

is genuinely surprised for once.

CHIANG

COMES TO Tony and Melanie, utterly unafraid, but clearly miffed.

TONY

Ah, the father of my country. Chiang,

you owe me for those Cuban cigars.

CHIANG

Tony, why are you doing this?

TONY

(mock-Asian accent)

I was educated in your country.

(straight)

Naw, I just want the loot. Clearly

there’s a bundle for Miss Boobs, and

I’ve delivered her.

CHIANG

Fair enough. Let her go and I’ll

see you get paid by the usual route.

TONY

I don’t want the usual cuts to disappear

from it. You can deliver me and my sweet-

heart to the U.N. together. I’ll assume you’re getting more for her than you’re

paying me, but I won’t complain, after

what happened to the good priests. Besides, you seem to have a payroll to meet.

CHIANG

Let her go, Tony. We’re not taking her

to the U.N.

TONY

Why? Who pays better?

CHIANG

I do. I’m taking her to Ank-Var.

TONY

(confused)

Ank-Var? Ank-Var is in the hands of

the Rebels —

CHIANG

sighs and makes a signal.

BUSHES

A few Rebel Soldiers (also wearing the Oriental armband) step out of hiding.

TONY, MELANIE, & CHIANG

TONY (Cont’d)

— who turn out to be in your hands.

Chiang, what is up?

CHIANG

Something important to all mankind,

Tony. Now let her go. You know you

won’t kill her.

TONY

And you won’t kill me, or

who’d get the Victoria’s Secret outfits for your girlfriends?

I’m coming with you.

A Guard holds out a wristwatch for Chiang to see.

CHIANG

Very well. Get her in the machine.

WIDER

Soldiers ready helicopter.

TONY, MELANIE, AND CHIANG

FOLLOW THEM as Tony and Melanie, bound together, his gun at her head, enter the helicopter. Tony, in doorway, stops and says —

TONY

And remember — if I go out, she

goes out.

CHIANG

shakes his head as at a petty annoyance, enters the helicopter after Tony and Melanie.

 

FADE IN:

THE WAY WE WAR – Part 3 of 3
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3 Responses to “screenplay THE WAY WE WAR by Robert Patrick Part 2 of 3”

  1. RESUME/Links to Online Works « Robert Patrick's Personal Blog Says:

    […]    THE WAY WE WAR – Part 2 of 3 https://robertpatrickpersonal.wordpress.com/2009/07/13/screenplay-the-way-we-war-by-robert-patrick-pa…    THE WAY WE WAR – Part 3 of 3 […]

  2. screenplay THE WAY WE WAR by Robert Patrick Part 1 of 3 « Robert Patrick's Personal Blog Says:

    […] Blog Just another WordPress.com weblog « screenplay DELUSION by Robert Patrick screenplay THE WAY WE WAR by Robert Patrick Part 2 of 3 […]

  3. ONLINE VIDEOS, SCRIPTS, SCREENPLAYS, AND SLIDESHOWS « Quit Says:

    […] THE WAY WE WAR – Part 2 of 3 https://robertpatrickpersonal.wordpress.com/2009/07/13/screenplay-the-way-we-war-by-robert-patrick-pa… THE WAY WE WAR – Part 3 of 3 […]

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